Judge: Ma'am, let me get this straight. You're asking this court to order your former boyfriend to pay child support?
Lady: Yes, Your Honor. He should take responsibility.
Judge: Responsibility for whose child?
Lady: My child, Your Honor.
Judge: Is he the biological father?
Lady: No, but we were together when I got pregnant.
Judge: I'm sorry… what?
Lady: We were dating at the time. I believe he should help me raise the child.
Judge: You believe? Ma'am, did he father this child?
Lady: I don't know who the father is.
Judge: You don't know who the father is, but you know who you want to pay?
Lady: Your Honor, he was my boyfriend. He was supposed to be there for me.
Judge: Being your boyfriend does not automatically make him the father of your child. Did he agree to adopt the child?
Lady: No.
Judge: Did he sign any legal document accepting parental responsibility?
Lady: No, but I thought he would stand by me.
Judge: Standing by you and being legally responsible for a child are two entirely different things. You cannot simply walk into this courtroom and nominate your ex-boyfriend as the father because you don't know who the biological father is.
Lady: So you're saying he has no responsibility at all?
Judge: I'm saying you need to establish a legal basis for that responsibility. A relationship is not a paternity test, ma'am!
Lady: But I need financial support!
Judge: And I understand that. But the court cannot turn your former boyfriend into a father simply because the actual father is unknown.
Lady: This is unfair!
Judge: What's unfair is expecting someone to pay for a child he did not father, without a legal basis. Court is adjourned!
I hired a promoter for this album, Acoustic Mourning, my lifelong dream. He ran off with the money. If you can, please send this to as many people as possible. Obi Wan, you're my only hope.