Ackerman (@Yarilo7brigada)

"I was married to Bruce Willis during the first three Die Hards, which makes sense, because the last two sucked" - Demi Moore In this clip, Demi Moore wittily trolls her ex-husband Bruce Willis at the Comedy Central Roast. "We had wonderful times together. We shared a lot. I have three beautiful, amazing children. Four, if you count Bruce. Plus the dogs and Ashton. So it's like six" "That's his real hair. And ladies, let me tell you: the carpet matches the drapes… He's bald down there too. Everywhere you look, he looks like a dick" "After our divorce, he said he considered the end of our marriage his biggest failure. But Bruce, don't be so hard on yourself. You've had much bigger failures. Planet Hollywood, Hudson Hawk, Striking Distance, campaigning for Michael Dukakis, turning down Clooney's role in Ocean's Eleven to focus on playing the harmonica…" "I look back on all the years we spent together. We had our ups and downs, of course, but those were some of the best times of my life. I just look at our marriage like The Sixth Sense: you were dead the whole time"

Hugh Jackman is standing on the red carpet, someone asks him about the award, and suddenly he says: "I feel good, but Rollo, I'm sorry mate. We go way back. I used to teach you at a high school in PE and I want to know how your physical education is progressing. It's very important to me" And then he even brings up the PE kit and the swimming pool. All of it with this calm smile, like they'd just seen each other in class yesterday.